The Journey Is More Important Than The Beginning Or The End.

CREE-----PY
Listening to: Airship Theme by Nobou Uematsu for FFXI

Yesterday my mother called me and said "A Federal Investigator from the Government was here. He said he needed to talk to you."

The first thing that came to my mind was "Oh...my...god.. they finally have caught me for my music, movies and program cracking! Oh shit, I registered my copy of windows... I bet that's how it happened. Damn it... not now, I am in college."

She then goes on to say "They need to ask you a few things about Teddy."

Apparently Teddy is going to be promoted into the Secret Service. He is in the Army now. But before they can rank him up, he needs to pass background check after background check.

So this morning I got out of bed, opened my door, and there is an FBI agent flashing his badge at me. I was like "OH MAN THIS IS SO COOL!"

The guy walked right by my computer not realizing he just walked by 3 gigs of music and is running off an illegal version of Windows. He walked by my CD wallet, which has about 40 copied DVDs in it. He then sat on the couch.

He asked me questions. Lots of them. Now Curt should be expecting a guest. I referenced Curt. I hope he cleans up his house a little. Heh heh.

Other than that exciting piece of info, my life seems pretty bland as of right now. I started working at the Library the other night. I have class from 12:30-3:30 today and then I work from 4:00-9:00pm. I then come home to build some dumb stick projects or bridges or something. I also have to work on a project which is due for 2D tomorrow. Aiy...

I try not to think about my loneliness. I try not to remember much of the past 2 years. Everything I think about always leads back to Molly. When it does, it makes me question why she was that way back then. Why did I fall in love with her? Why did she hold onto me until this last month? Why did college change her. Real love doesn't just go away unless you make it go away. After the letter I got from her, it took me about 15 minutes to stop crying. I was even more confused. She realizes that she did this all. She realizes it was college. But what she doesn't understand is why she let it happen, or why she doesn't care sometimes.

I know when I finally decide to date someone else, they won't like the fact of Molly and I hanging out as friends. I wouldn't either. God, it would drive me insane... it almost did with her. So that means Molly and I may never see each other again outside of "Here is your stuff back."

We're gonna be walking the streets one day and we will pass each other by, not completly knowing of the other. That's the future life has infront of us now. All because of what? College and tech guys...? My failure as a bf?

God, I have had some weird dreams the last few nights. Each time I have woken up stressed, heartbroken, or disoriented, confused, lost. My body has also been sweating reallybad while I sleep. It is really bugging me. I sleep without the covers hoping that helps but I always awake in a sweat.

*yawns* I got to go to class in a few. Oiy. I wish I could go back in time.

Blogged by Marcus Morris at 11:13 AM